Things I said today that could be taken out of context.
"Just pee on it already!"
"That baby was delicious!"
"Get your face out of my balls, please."
"A little faster. Almost! Ahhhh. And we're done. Nice work Ted."
"I tasted your fish taco before, and it was disgusting."
"I wish I was a Nazi."
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And on a completely unrelated topic, but undeserving of an entire post:
Do you think it's weird that everyday Floyd and I walk past this church, The Immaculate Heart of Mary, and everyday he takes a crap right in front of it? And coincidentally, it's the church that wouldn't baptize me when I was a baby because my parents weren't married. I never told Floyd this story, either. He just drops a log right there, every day. Could he be an Atheist too, and just is more... vociferous isn't the right word... he's just more aggressive in his beliefs?
I don't know. Maybe he's Protestant?
2 comments:
Really? They wouldn't baptize you? What kind of crap is THAT?
I mean, I know that it doesn't matter really because you are an atheist, but dude. That is just Lame.
i think they knew i was born of the devil.
honestly, they wouldn't baptize me or my sister. only after threatening to call the archdiocese and complain did we finally get it done, but not at the church.
interestingly, but totally offpoint, that particular priest was always trying to do good things for the "community". he organized trips to baseball games for the boy scouts. and he built a rec center for underprivileged boys in the frickin' rectory! not so coincidentally, he suudenly left our church, and was never heard from again. knowing what we know now about how pedophile priests were treated (that being exactly like that), it's a little frightening to think about what went on in that rec room.
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