Thursday, February 14, 2008

Happy VD

God I hate this day. It is hands down the most insufferable holiday of them all. Sure, Christmas sucks. But at least you end up getting some presents out of the deal. And Thanksgiving is tough, too. Having to spend time with your family? For me, it's a nightmare. But, at least you get to eat until your stomach explodes, and then it's totally acceptable to take a 5 hour nap. In fact, it's expected.

But Valentine's Day? Ugh. Shoot me. Even if you're not single, it's a pain in the ass. It's just having to look around and seeing all of these sickeningly happy people.... and I mean, everwhere you go! At the coffee shop, people cuddling and cooing. At the supermarket, couples holding hands and kissing and planning out their romantic evening. Even at the Home fucking Depot! I'm sorry, but anywhere where there are power tools and roofing supplies, PDA's should be illegal. They should be hauled away and taken to the gallows and given the punishment they deserve.

And perhaps I'm being petty and self-pitying, but I don't care. It's not like I've never been with someone on VD (as I am wont to call it.). Even when I was with someone, it was difficult to get through. The anticipation and the wondering whether she is going to appreciate and love what it is that you got her. And what do you end up getting out of the deal? Being forced to pay for a dinner that is usually above your means, watching a movie that even feminists would laugh at you for watching, and in all likelihood, mediocre sex. Woo-hoo!

And this year, I'm not even going to get the mediocre sex. And my dinner: A frozen chicken pot pie. The movie: None. I'm watching LOST, having a whole half gallon of ice cream, maybe a bottle of wine, and then it's off to bed where I will watch The Daily Show, some of The Colbert Report, and fall asleep before midnight (as per the usual). Come to think of it, that is an ideal evening for me. Anyone else think so? I'll even throw in a foot rub. That is, if you can stand touching my feet.

Roy Orbison- Only The Lonely

My VD theme song.

The Everly Brothers- When Will I Be Loved

Edith Piaf- Non, je ne regrette rien


Julia Lundman said...

Well Hallmark holidays will fuck you up every time. that's why i boycott the day.

OVER RATED and set up to be a big disappointment, always. Kinda like Christmas, but far more personal.

I hope the ice cream was good, at least.

Great blog, adam. I really appreciate your writing.


Semi-Charmed said...

I also watched Lost and ate ice cream. Chocolate peanut butter. I barely noticed VD this year and I liked it that way.
Good episode though, right?? Sayid is my fav.

Adam said...

julie- i agree, the boycott is the way to go. another commercialized travesty of a holiday. ice cream was great. neapolitan. mmmmmmmmmmm.

amber- yeah, that's really the way to go. just ignoring it. i tend to harp on things.

as i said before, neapolitan. mmmmmmmmmmm.

sayid is...... not my favorite. he's ok. but he always ends up causing more problems than he fixes. myself, i'm a ben man. love me some benjamin linus. (oh and kate. LOVE me some kate austen!)so as a ben fan, that was an incredible episode. i'd even go as far to say that it was redonkulous. and honestly, halfway through the episode, i called it. i knew he was working for ben. it's the only thing that made sense.